24 Truths About Being an Adult


So, on Thursday I turned the big 2-4! I feel like that's officially an adult... *gulp*. Whilst I feel far from someone who has it all figured out, there are some real lessons I've learned that I wanted to share with you today.


Your relationships

Low-maintenance friends vs. people you hang out with

If you've been to university, odds are you'll have true, life-long friends who live in another part of the country or even the other side of the world to you. It really makes you appreciate the difference between people who are your total soul mates and the people you hang out with on a day-to-day basis. At school, those were always the same people, but as you grow up they can be two completely different things.

It's ok to only have a few true friends

I'm not sure if most people are like me but in each place I go, whether it's university, work, school, college, I generally make 1-3 really, really close friends who I know will always be there for me. Whilst I often hang around in bigger groups, there are only a couple of those people who I'd call up in tears after an awful day or who I'd help bury a body... (just kidding!)

You shouldn't be with someone until you're happy being alone

In terms of love, it often comes when you least expect it and when you aren't necessarily looking for it. People who need to be in relationships or feel insecure when alone usually do best to fix themselves before trying to be with someone else.

You'll probably leave it longer than your parents did to 'settle down'

People just do things later these days! We're living longer, the economy has changed and so have social expectations. I have friends who feel weird for being single at 24 or 25 but it's so totally normal. I personally can't believe I'm only 2 or 3 years younger than my mum was when she had me because I'm not even remotely ready to be responsible for a little human being!

Single or taken, never neglect your mates

Some people get into relationships and drop off the face of the earth - don't be one of them! Whilst it's normal to get wrapped up in the early days and it can be a difficult balance your life out, you need both your friends and your significant other.

The worst thing could turn out to be the best thing in the long-run

Things can happen in the most unexpected ways. Often when one door closes, another opens and you'll look back and feel as though things worked out in the end.

You become a better judge of character

The older I get, the easier I find it to see through people's facades and gauge whether the 'real' person is someone I can connect with.

Your social life

'Nights out' end a lot earlier

A typical night out for the office worker ends at 11:30pm, hugging the toilet whilst your insides churn, because 'after work drinks' were at somewhere that doesn't serve food. Again. (I'm only half joking...)

Staying in can be just as good as going out

I'm kind of 'over' nightclubs for the most part. I'd much rather go for dinner or to a bar when I catch up with my friends so we can actually chat! However I've also come to appreciate a Deliveroo or an M&S Dine in for 2 for £10 accompanied by a bottle of wine and a film with my friends or boyfriend.

You feel kind of old in clubs

Did we really dress like that? Did we really drink blue VKs? Did the boys really look about 16? - Just some of the thoughts that go through my head when I'm on a night out and a herd of freshers enters the building.

You care a lot less about what other people think

It feels like secondary school and even 6th form college, to an extent, is a small world where everyone knows everyone's business and most people are pretending to be something they're not. It wasn't until I got to university that I really began to be true to myself - there were no cliques and there were some pretty crazy characters - and it's stuck. I just really don't care about being 'accepted' by the group and paradoxically, probably find myself more well-liked as a result!

Work

Learning to deal with people you'd rather not

At every stage of your life so far (besides family, I guess) you've probably had a lot of control over people you have and haven't wanted to be around. At work you have to collaborate and sometimes work closes with people who you may disagree with on just about everything.

It's ok not to know what you want to do

Very few people seem to stay in a job or a company for more than a few years these days and even through to their 40s, many people take dramatic career changes. Just go with the flow and don't think too much about whether what you're doing is going to be for the rest of your life (because it probably won't be!)

You'll become a slave to either tea or coffee

There are only two types of people in an office: those who can't function without their caffeine injection and those who drink 10 cups of tea a day.

Everyone struggles sometimes

I've honestly had the most composed, ambitious, 'going places' people confess deep insecurities over a pint after work and seen the most 'put together' professionals burst into tears over stuff that's going on in their personal lives. It's ok not to be ok and it happens to the best of us. In work you only see a very small part of who people are or who they want to be perceived as.

Your job is only as good as the people you're working with

You could have the best job in the world on paper but if you don't feel energised, inspired and encouraged by the people you're working with then you'll dread going to work. Likewise, having an amazing team chemistry can make dull and monotonous jobs just about bearable.

Sometimes you have to choose

Your priorities will change over time and sometimes you might have to choose between that amazing job on the other side of the country or staying with your other half, settling down to have kids or focussing on a promotion. There's no right or wrong answer, but you may find yourself making decisions you never would've thought you would.

Opportunities can come out of nowhere 

Never underestimate the power of being good at your job, quick to learn and easy to get on with. People will notice and the perfect job could come out of nowhere.

Existential *stuff*

You'll never regret spending your money on travel

Yeah, my house deposit could look a bit healthier but I don't think anyone has lay on their deathbed wishing they'd had more possessions and fewer experiences. Travel is one of the most enriching rewards you can gain, so do as much of it as you can!

It may not be as easy as it was for your parents

The days of most people owning a house and having a decent retirement to enjoy are probably over. It's ok not to have all of your **** together! We live in different times and whilst it's depressing, don't be too hard on yourself; we're all in the same boat, largely.

It's ok to live at home

Living with your parents (if your fortunate enough to have that option) has often had a bit of a stigma attached to it, but as I said, we live in a different world to people growing up in past decades. Rent is more expensive and for many people, saving enough to get a deposit to buy is impossible without mum and dad's 'mates rates' rent. 

You'll feel more confident than ever before

I've honestly never felt so outgoing when speaking to other people or as confident in who I am and how I look as I do in my 20s. When you're a teenager you spend so much time being embarrassed, shy or self-critical, that it's great to feel those negative emotions fading away.

There's no time like the present

It's a cliche but it really is true! Stop putting things off and thinking that you'll do things 'one day', because I'm starting to realise that without action, that day won't come all by itself. 

You'll probably never feel like a 'real' adult

I remember being 16 and thinking how 'old' 24 was, how sophisticated and grown up people of that age were. Now I've reached it myself, I honestly don't feel like the superwoman I expected. But that's ok! I'm starting to wonder if anyone ever truly feels like a grown-up...


What has growing up taught you?


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37 comments

  1. I definitely needed this post! But you're so right about not regretting spending money on travel, it's the best thing and even though some friends come and go there's always the ones that are there forever.

    http://claresloves.blogspot.co.uk/

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  2. Great post Jasmine! I turn 23 in less than two weeks and I have my life together in some aspects more than I ever imagined, but in others it feels like everyone is getting engaged or having babies and I'm single as ever. Hope you had a lovely birthday and that 24 is a great year for you x

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    1. Yeah it's scary to see so many of my peers already settling down! I had a good one thanks, I hope you have a great 23rd :) xx

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  3. Great post! Life is so different compared to our parents era - my parents got married at 19 & 21 and they had 3 kids 3 years in a row! Life was so different then with less opportunities for travel etc.

    I have learned that you can have a plan but life can just rip that plan up and you need to deal with whatever is thrown at you. I could never, ever have imagined getting a debilitating illness which has changed my life forever. There are so many things we can't control but I believe we all owe it to ourselves to be happy and live a happy life so we need to do whatever necessary to do that xx

    Beautylymin| LuxurySkincareGiveaway

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    1. All of this is so true - we can never know how things might turn out for us and the struggles and successes we could find as a result xx

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  4. This was such a good post and so many true points!

    Lotte | www.lottebeautybox.blogspot.co.uk

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  5. It's weird to think that at my age both my mum, and two older sisters both had children...meanwhile I often forget to even feed myself.
    Alicia x
    Aesthetic Obsessed

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  6. Love this post! The 24 club is pretty good in my opinion :) xx

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  7. Great post! I turn 21 this year and actually find it quite scary to be leaving my teen years officially behind, once you hit 18, I think the years just fly by. I hope you had a lovely birthday and that 24 brings you lots of fun! Definitely agree with you on the making stronger friendships in university, high school drama and cliques seem so minor now - I don't know why I wasted so many years worrying about the 'popular' kids and what people thought of me, seems so silly!

    Toni x
    www.clarkecouture.co.uk

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    1. I agree - it was all way too fast from 21 onwards! xx

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  8. These are all so very true! I can relate to all of these. We don't see time pass by and without realising it, we are officially "adults" (I say officially, because as you pointed out, I still find it difficult to feel like one haha. Growing older has its perks, and like you I feel much better about myself and about going to people. I also like staying at home more than going out, and whenever I go to the club I can feel it the next day and that's when I really feel older haha. I hope you had a great time for your birthday!

    Julia x
    Last Post: A Stroll Through Warwick, UK | http://juliaspeaksbeauty.blogspot.co.uk/2017/06/old-town.html

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    1. Thank you :) it was lovely! I can definitely agree that I'm far more confident than I was 5-6 years ago xx

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  9. I think growing up has taught me much of the same. Having a child young has taught me how incredible my own mum was. It has taught me how tough life can be - and it definitely isn't cheap!

    Erin || MakeErinOver

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  10. What a great article Jasmine! I find that as you get older your priorities change, and the plans that you had change as well! At 24 I thought that I'd be a teacher and be looking at buying a place with my sister.... she's since moved to the states and I work in banking now. Obviously those are two aspects of many many other things that I had originally planned. Wishing you a happy birthday!

    https://thedianaedition.com

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    1. Thank you! It really is crazy how things can change like that :) xx

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  11. I love this post Jasmine <3 I relate to everything! I'm also one of those people that has always seemed to hang out in large groups, but I would only ever trust one or two people with everything! I love what you said about no one on their deathbed wishing they had more possessions and less experiences, I feel like a lot of people these days think they need the newest/latest everything when in reality, we don't! Fantastic post <3 xxx
    http://www.samanthafrances.co.uk

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    1. Thank you Samantha :) sounds like we've had some really similar experiences! xx

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  12. I couldn't agree more with these, I'm only 19 but these are happening to me already oh gosh!

    Lauren x Huggled

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  13. I could relate to so many of these points! x

    Jordan Alice

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  14. I completely agree with your point about work only being as good as the people you work with. So true! Good friends at work make it so much better (and the same is true for the opposite!)

    She Likes to Shop

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    1. It can make or break your working environment for sure! xx

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  15. Such a lovely post, very relate-able! xx

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  16. Tea is my vice and reading the whole "did the boys really look 16" nearly made me spit it out. Brilliantly written post Jasmine and a very happy birthday to you xxx

    ALittleKiran | Bloglovin | Blog Sale

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  17. I turn 27 this year (where have the years gone?) and sometimes I'm shocked that I should be an actually adult! I couldn't agree with all your points more! Especially the clubbing ones! I feel about 90 when i'm in a club and I would much rather go out for a nice dinner. xx

    www.lpagebeauty.com

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  18. Every one of these I was like, yep, yep, yep - all so true! I was dreading turning 24/25 but all these points make me think its actually kind of great. Post work drinks - why does no one eat?! Those Friday nights have ruined my weekends too many times haha!

    Emma xx
    emmajtaylor.com

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    1. I know! I'm always just like 'ok, but when's food...?' hahaha xx

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  19. I was a mum at 23 so I didn't quite experience a lot of these and had to 'mature' faster than most. I think it was a huge struggle for me back then because I had no idea what I was doing, my ex-husband and I wasn't the best fit for each other and with a child, my life was chaotic. I did find out who my true friends were though and I discovered I am stronger than I thought I was.

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  20. I love a bit of lifestyle posts on your blog Jasmine. Loved this post.

    Ash | www.mstantrum.com

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  21. I got married at 26 and became mommy at 29..Now I feel it was too early for marriage but back then I felt i was ready to get married to my bf (we were in long distance relationship for many years) and Marriage was the only priority of my life (how silly!!). I am 32 now and the only thing i tell to unmarried people is to live your life before getting hitched. Secondly, life is a biggest teacher ..Experiences make you grown up. I definitely am more confident now and love what I am doing (just blogging and self employed). Though I am earning so much less than what I was when working with big brands but I am happy now. Another thing I am loving about my life is I am away from some negative relationships which used to drag me earlier, used to make me weak and unhappy. I am happy with my little family and I appreciate every bit of it.
    Ash | www.mstantrum.com

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    1. It's so interesting to hear your perspective :) I also had been wondering for a while what you did for a living, so this was an insight! xx

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  22. Totally agree with the single or not, don't neglect your mates. So important to keep in touch!

    www.upyourvlog.com

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  23. So many truths here. And the best thing about this post is that its making me realise how lucky I have been in my life so far. Honestly, where I am now things could be so much worse and I'm so grateful for all the opportunities I have had compared to my parents and then I also agree, they also had some things a little easier than we do now. Also, yes...COFFEE! xxx
    UmmBabyBeauty

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  24. Happy birthday! Almost.

    I've realised the older you get, the feeling of not having everything figured out still lingers, but it's okay because most people feel the same way. I only began to feel more settled and comfortable as me, after 26.

    You sound far more put together already!

    Shanelle || SLovesAutumn

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    1. Haha yeah I feel like it won't be going away any time soon! xx

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  25. Hahahaha I love this post. Growing up has taught me to be myself and to not overreact to situations because they'll seem like a tiny deal after time has passed. This is a very relatable post!!
    I actually wrote a similar post that you might be able to relate to. Here it is: http://libbyschoice.blogspot.co.uk/2017/05/6-small-things-to-start-doing-to.html

    Libby x

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  26. Thank you for your comments - they've been both funny and interesting to read :) I'm glad so many of you could relate to this post! xx

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