20160703

Don't Judge a Book by its Cover | Beauty Blogger Stereotypes


‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’ is an age-old saying and probably one of the first ‘lessons’ we ever got taught as kids, so why do people still think it’s ok to be judgemental of beauty bloggers?

As a blogger you seem to get it from all angles: men who’ve decided they can’t take you seriously and women who've decided you're betraying the sisterhood before they even know you. And why? Because you take pride in your appearance and you have an interest in something seen as feminine, frivolous and silly. Yet you dare to be intelligent at the same time. It’s almost as though society can’t comprehend people being anything other than a stereotype. It’s not ok to for a guy to be into football but stand up for women’s rights against his supposed mates. It’s not ok to be a pretty girl who likes video games and cosplaying.

Just because I blog about beauty doesn’t mean I don’t love a whole load of other things. I’m not sure why it’s so difficult for people to comprehend that a person may hold more than a single thought in their mind or have more than one interest at a time. Not everyone chooses to show every aspect of themselves through their blogs; for me my blog is a place I can relax through and write about something fun that I also happen to be passionate about. I don’t use it to record my thoughts on the bedroom tax because I choose not to, not because I don’t have an opinion. It's honestly just a reflection of themselves; they don't have a wide breath of interests so can't conceptualise what it's like to be a little more complex than that. They put you down either out of insecurity or out of a desire to label or categorise you into a neat little box, so they can act like they know what you're about without bothering to get to know you.

I also feel like there's a double standard at play; why is it ok to be a professional in a business environment who likes golf but not who likes beauty? Neither of them are related to your job; they're personal interests and that's ok. It seems illogical that you're considered shallow and silly for liking makeup because it 'doesn't matter' but not if you like football, which is 'just a game'. God forbid if you like both...

People seem to form a judgement of you before they’ve met you; that you’re going to be snotty, pretentious and take yourself too seriously. Whilst that may be true of some bloggers (show me a section of society that has no one like that!) it doesn’t mean that the majority of us can’t have a laugh, make fun of ourselves or engage in deeper forms of conversation than one revolving around the latest MAC Limited Edition Collection (though I'm totally up for that too!) 

I’ve learnt to tune out alleged feminists who say the act of wearing makeup in itself makes you a slave of the patriarchy. Luckily these people are few and far between, even more so in recent years but that doesn’t mean they don’t like to shout over everyone else. It doesn’t matter if you wear makeup or don’t wear makeup, it matters why you do. And even if you do it for the ‘wrong’ reasons you deserve support, not sneering at.

I’m sure the vast majority reading here wear makeup because they find it fun and beautiful in itself. I saw a meme the other day that said: ‘girls wear makeup to impress boys’ ‘do you really think I own 70 MAC lipsticks for a guy who can’t tell the difference between Ruby Woo and Russian Red?!’ My thoughts exactly! It's both bemusing and hilarious that certain men think everything we do is for their benefit. Half of the time (for me at least) it isn't even about what a product looks like on me; it's the packaging, it's how pretty it is in the pan, it's the act of putting it on... It's a lot of things but it's not 'damn, I hope that guy over there notices how I blended Peach Smoothie out as my transition shade then deepened the crease with Frappe'. That's not to say you never consider how you look to others; but so does the rest of society! If I don't feel like wearing makeup then I won't. However for me (most of the time, anyway...) it's a ritual I enjoy. I like having that half an hour in the morning to do something I find fun. I absolutely love eyeshadow and it's my favourite part of my routine, yet I wear glasses most of the day!

Never apologise or feel you have to 'explain yourself' for having a fun, interactive way of spending your spare time that gives you something tangible to show for it. On the whole, most people you come across will be pretty impressed with your blog and it's definitely something to be proud of. But if you do come across someone narrow-minded who wants to put you down for it then just tell them to stop projecting their own basic-ness onto you. Who says you can't do statistical data analysis whilst having your highlight on fleck? OWN IT!


Do you ever feel judged for your love of beauty?


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69 comments

  1. This such a brilliant post!!! Couldn't have said better myself! I always feel judged because of love for makeup. When i tell people what i have a degree in and my educational achievements they look shocked and normally come out with 'ah you like a hairdresser'. Which isn't a bad thing but I'm like what does a hairdresser look like? Its so frustrating sometimes. xx

    P.s I'd love to hear your thoughts on the bedroom tax haha

    LPage Beauty

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    1. I completely agree - people have such fixed ideas about what a person doing xyz 'should' look like! xx

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  2. Such a thoughtful post. Makeup should always be for yourself, for fun, for a bit of extra confidence. You should never feel like you have to wear it - only that you want to! Lovely post Jasmine :)
    Ambar | Her Little Loves

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  3. mostly of the time i feel judged. it doesn't matter on what. it's the society that tells you to do this and that. it's true. do i care? nope.

    then strong feminists who say you are wearing make up or even shaving just because its the men society that impose you this routine. i can't stand them. in general, every strict opinion that doesn't allow the possibility of variables piss me off A LOT. I have argued about it so many times with friends, making scenes in public spaces (embarrassment level 10) but they were wrong. I mean you cannot agree with me but you should respect my perspective and vice versa.

    sorry i got carried away!!XD and yes, it is not so difficult understanding we might have million passions one very different from the other!!(:

    xx from Brighton
    Cate ღ kate/idoscope | youtube | Enter my Charlotte Tilbury GIVEAWAY here

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  4. Such an amazing post and I can't agree more - you've really hit the nail on the head with this one and it upsets me that so many people still don't understand you can be interested in makeup like a boy can be interested in football, just personal interests and differences, amazing post!

    Lucy | Forever September

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    1. Exactly - I don't see how one is 'acceptable' and one is not! xx

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  5. I love this post and totally agree. I don't wear makeup for others, I wear it for me because I enjoy it, I enjoy wearing it, I enjoy purchasing it and I definitely love putting it one! Just because someone loves makeup doesn't mean they can't be intelligent or have other interests too. Amazing post!

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  6. This post is everything! I find it annoying the sterotypes around the notion of continually buying makeup. Like comments such as 'you have enough' or 'what do you do with all that makeup' but it's not applied to the purchasing of clothes. Like what a girl can't have options. Haha I really enjoyed reading this post.

    www.themakeupaficionado.com

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  7. This was such an amazing post to read, so spot on with the blogger stereotype! It annoys me how some people think it's stupid to have an interest in makeup, yet having an interest in something else is fine x

    http://emmaboughtwhat.blogspot.co.uk/

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  8. HELL YEAH!!! This post is so true and honest! Girls wearing makeup for boys? I still can't believe people think that! We wear it because we love it! Makeup is an art, I still can't master my brows or eyeliner! Makeup doesn't make someone dumb nor boring. It's a part of us and people need to shove it! It doesn't mean anymore or any less of us being girls!

    Fix Me In Forty Five - A Beauty & Lifestyle Blog
    Blog Lovin' // Instagram
    xx

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  9. I absolutely love this post, and that is exactly the reason why I keep my blog secret to a lot of my friends and family. I know I will be instantly judged as superficial (I already am sometimes, just because I wear a little bit more makeup than just foundation and mascara) by some of them. The fact is beauty is an industry and it wouldn't exist if some people weren't interested in it, and, even the girl that judges you for wearing lipsticks, uses at least a little bit of concealer so, in a sense, it matters to her too! And, just as you, that's the routine and the action of putting it on that I enjoy the most about makeup!

    http://fannyanddailybeauty.com

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    1. Aw no that's such a shame - I hope that you feel able to tell people about your blog eventually! xx

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  10. I actually found I got the most comments about my love of beauty from friends - especially one who had actually been a beauty blogger but had 'grown up and lost some of the materialism'. But I don't care, I don't have a huge collection, I don't struggle with money to be able to afford it, so I don't see the harm!

    Great post! x

    NINEGRANDSTUDENT: A Student Lifestyle Blog

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  11. Love this post, when I tell people I have a beauty blog they are always shocked to hear I do it alongside a science degree!

    www.whynotblog.co.uk

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  12. Thank you SO MUCH for this post!
    I have had to live with being stereotyped for being home schooled, and now for being a beauty blogger. Yes I have friends, yes I graduated, and yes I love makeup. People just like having everyone in a little labeled box so they know how to think of them. I am not defined by being a blogger, neither am I defined by being home schooled, so please don't judge me until you know what is in my mind and heart.
    A New Old Fashioned Girl

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  13. This post was amazing! Every time I mention I blog I get this look of 'oh god, she's an idiot' and I honestly feel like turning around and saying: you know what? I've got a degree and I moved out after uni to support myself rather than relying on parents, and yes I have a blog because I love it. it's SO frustrating and demeaning!

    Steph - www.nourishmeblog.co.uk

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  14. I love this!! I keep my blog a secret from a lot of friends finally last year told my family about it. I'm a style blogger and I get the awesome eye roll that you get when you say "I am a fashion blogger" then the follow up of what do you know about fashion.oh love it. And the double standardstandard we women are subject to are horrendous. I wear makeup for me and that is it. Me. If I want to put my extensions on and contour that is my problem and it makes me feel good. Your post speaks to me on so many levels. Bravo!

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  15. Loved this post! It's so true that liking makeup is a passion like any other passion - it doesn't make you any less intelligent for that being your passion. It's crazy that in this supposedly enlightened day and age people still can't get their heads around that. I personally absolutely love the empowering feeling of taking pride in my appearance and also using my mind in an academic way. I love being a multi-faceted person and I think I always will. Good on you, you keep on with your statistical analysis while you rock your highlighter - nothing cooler than that!!
    Rebecca | Notes From September
    Xx

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    1. You totally hit the nail on the head with this :) xx

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  16. I loved reading this post it was amazing!!!!

    http://www.littlebitofthat.co.uk/?m=1

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  17. I haven't met anyone that's judged me for my love of makeup yet (I don't think, could be judging without me knowing lol) but I have spoke to employers and things about my blog. Non surprisingly, the men usually act like it's a bit of a joke until I tell them I've worked with the likes of Harrods and things. I think the judgemental people are ones who don't understand what it's like to feel passionate about something to be honest! xx

    Just Little Things

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  18. Such an inspirational post Jasmine, you go girl! For me personally blogging actually does link to my career as I'm hoping to eventually become a fashion/beauty journalist but that certainly doesn't mean blogging is a waste of time for those where it has no links to their career. Blogging can help to develop our writing skills, time management, planning and organisation which are all useful and valuable attributes to have in most careers. I hate people that judge a book by its cover - it's what is on the inside that counts!

    Toni x
    www.clarkecouture.co.uk

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    1. When you sit down and list them on your CV you really do realise how many skills you get from blogging :) xx

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  19. This was such a lovely post! I could really relate to it! You made me giggle when you were saying that you dont have 70 mac lipsticks to impress a man that doesn't even know the difference between two of them! :)

    Amyx Makeupwithmissa.blogspot.co.uk

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  20. You are completely right, for me it feels the same. I feel judged all the time, a few weeks ago I saw a post on facebook where a guy asked all his female friends "is one girls here, that leaves the house without any makeup on? I bet not..." that made me so angry, because I use makeup and skincare to treat/pamper myself not because I'm desperate for guys to notice how my lashes look. The thing I love about blogging is just sharing my experience.

    loved to read your post!

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    1. Completely agree - how rude and dismissive of him! xx

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  21. Jasmine this post is brilliant. I have to agree with you on everything. I'm constantly being judged because of my love for makeup, people don't really believe you can make a living from writing about cosmetics.
    Lots of love,
    Gara. xx
    PS: If you fancy reading something... http://thingswedidntdo.squarespace.com/blog/2016/5/13/june-favourites

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  22. Very well said! I'm glad you addressed this issue. Also due to the feminism accusation... people wear make up to feel good. I don't wear make up everyday (skin issues) but when I do, yesterday for e.g I wanted to wear it to feel good about myself. Not for men, girls or my dog (aha) just me! It's relaxing, it's nice and you feel happier somehow... Make up has its cons and pros I suppose. Still I like this post. Thank you for sharing. x

    cheyannesorelle.blogspot.co.uk

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  23. I love this post so much! You should never have to apologise for self-care/love. I never felt 'pretty' until I was 16, I was crap with hair and make-up, clothes style and was always geeky at school. Dressing nice makes me feel confident and better about myself and I'm never going to say sorry for that nowadays. Lovely beauty blog! xxxxxxx

    Y x | www.thesweetsevenfive.com

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    1. Aw thank you and I totally agree it's not something you should ever feel you need to apologise for :) xx

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  24. Thanks for writing this post Jasmine! I am sure a lot (probably even the majority) of beauty/fashion bloggers feel the same but it can be hard to these thoughts into words, and you did it perfectly well. People who love makeup are instantly associated with being superficial, or silly, or even both. Sometimes I have been in a position where I didn't really want to tell people that I blog about beauty, because I know they'd judge me somehow. But why should we be ashamed of loving such a creative field, that makes us feel good, and empowered, and have fun? They are missing out, we surely aren't! ;)

    Julia x
    Last post: Tips To Visit Paris This Summer | http://juliaspeaksbeauty.blogspot.fr/2016/07/so-you-want-to-visit-paris-this-summer.html

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  25. Great post! My twit of an ex used to go on rants about girls who wear lots of makeup, which is ridiculous considering I wear quite a bit and own 20+ blushers! The vapid stereotype is dumb as anything x

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  26. Love this post, the amount of people baffled by the fact I work as a legal PA yet my blog is about travel as well as beauty.. as if a silly bimbo PA couldn't jump out of a plane, go hiking or climb a mountain because it doesn't fit with the feminine nature of what they presume a PA even is. I completely agree with you, people are far too judgemental! x

    Sarah from iheartcosmetics

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  27. I've had to put up with this exact typical stereotyping all my adult life, I'm now 44! I, like many others would hide the fact that I loved makeup that much that I had a huge stash of it too! I didn't even breathe a word that I was going on a makeup course to my work colleagues through fear of what they'd thought, which I know realise was silly! It wasn't until after I started reading beauty blogs and YouTube tutorials, and that is all thanks to you, Jasmine, and tonnes of others that I felt a lot less isolated, and now I have my own beauty blog I simply couldn't care less what other people think! Jasmine, you are so right! We do own it!

    Toni xx

    sheergloss

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  28. I totally agree! I am a full time economist and a part time beauty blogger... Who cares? Yet some people think it is pretty dumb that I have a blog, and think that I don't have a smart thing to say.

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    1. Totally agreed - I bet there are loads of 'secret bloggers' out there that people wouldn't expect to be xx

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  29. I totally know what you mean, but I have found the most judgement I ever get is from the girls on the counter. A few know im a blogger, and will chat away happily, but others wont even look at me if I don't have a full face of makeup on, then when I do they are suddenly my best friend. I just don't get it, I am allowed to love beauty and not wear it? Meh. lol

    http://www.makeerinover.co.uk

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    1. That's really interesting! I hadn't thought of it from that angle but you're right, sometimes I go shopping without makeup and people seem weirded out when I'm at the beauty counter xx

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  30. I love this post, Jasmine. People either assume I am a vapid air head, or wasting myself as a blogger. But I love all the difficulties and issues surrounding this world. Why does blogging put you in either camp?
    Angie | Chocolate & Lipstick | Beauty, Fashion & Lifestyle Blog

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  31. This is such an inspiring blog post!! Loved it!! It's so true how certain people won't let you be an individual and try to pigeon hole you into a certain stereo type even if you don't fully 'fit in' there. I created 2 YouTube channel's last year one about Beauty and one about Gaming, and some men who I personally know said it was weird that I have a gaming channel and a beauty channel as well and I couldn't help but wonder why? ... so what? I'm interested in both?... It's sad really that we are living in a society that is so accepting but so judgemental at the same time.

    Sacha xo
    aka. Beauty Jamm xo / Gamer Jamm xo

    http://beautyjammxo.blogspot.co.uk/

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  32. Well said!!
    (Do you really own 70 Mac lipsticks?)

    http://a-woman-of-a-certain-age.com/

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  33. I love this, I think you've spoken out for the majority of us here! The make-up wearing for men thing always gets me like no, I wear it to feel great and maybe even just to look at myself from afar to see how bright my highlight actually is. Amen girlfriend!
    Charlotte // www.charlottespicks.com

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  34. I used to wear makeup everyday for work to look 'polished' (I used to teach so needed to look presentable.) Then I began to get ill but had no idea was it was. I was really depressed as my job and illness were sucking the life out of me. But teaching is all about putting on a front no matter who annoys you in class or how bad your day is or how ill you actually feel. So then I began to use makeup as a mask. Then no one would be able to see how bad i felt emotionally or physically. Then I was bedbound and housebound and didn't wear makeup for a whole year. Then feeling a bit better i made a news years resolution to wear makeup and wear my contacts again. And it felt good- taking care of myself again. Then I started watching youtube videos- Lauren Luke and reading magazines which encouraged me to experiment. Now I love makeup because it's like a change of clothes it can make you look sexy, sweet and innocent, rock chick etc. You can play up your eyes you lips get cheekbones. I love putting on makeup almost as much as going out.

    I also remember talking to a fellow beauty blogger who is a psychologist and she says she blogs under a different name because of airhead stereotypes may not give her clients confidence in her ability or her professionalism.

    take care, nikki x

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    1. There are all sorts of reasons people love and want to use makeup and this really does highlight that people shouldn't be so quick to judge. I can imagine makeup is a big part of feeling ready for the world when you're been ill xx

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  35. LOVE THIS POST. I feel like I always get judged for liking makeup and blogging about it. Several women I know have actually made condescending remarks suggesting that I'm an airhead simply because I love makeup and beauty. It used to irk me a lot, but now I find it kind of hilarious because you're right, it says more about them than me. People are actually extremely shocked when they find out I used to be a debater in high school. It's like, just because I like to write about lipstick does not mean I'm intellectually vapid. Ugh, simpletons lol!

    xx
    Nida | Caked To The Nines

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    1. Yes it really does say more about them than us! xx

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  36. Preach!! I've always said that it's ridiculous to claim that women wear makeup for men, when my boyfriend certainly can't tell the difference between all my lipsticks, not to even mention foundations, highlighters and all that jazz. xx

    http://www.shakespeareandsparkle.com/

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  37. Such a lovely post! I feel like everyone needs to read this! I agree 100% with everything you said! <3

    Amelia | http://amelia-g.blogspot.com.au/

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  38. I can't tell you how much I loved this post! I didn't get into makeup until I was 24, because I thought makeup was STUPID and SHALLOW. I am so much more mature now in my thinking that I understand the meaning of the word fun, not everything needs to be so serious. I also can't believe how shallow people are, how bold they can be because I'm wearing thick eyeliner!

    Batty4Beauty.com

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  39. I love this post its so true i think its really important to not judge as look at me haha male beauty blogger

    www.beautyandtheboy.com

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  40. Fortunately I'v not come across anything like this personally but I totally understand what you mean about people categorizing you. Everyone has multiple interests so it doesn't seem logical for people to be shoving others into one category in their head. That's boring.I love getting to know peoples other interests. However I have a long way to catch up to your 70 mac lipsticks haha

    Claire ❤ | My Little Memoir

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  41. Yes! I love this post...I agree 100% that if you like to wear a full face of makeup or your interests involve collecting lipstick, people automatically think you have a low self esteem or that you are not intelligent. Neither is the case for me, I have a true and genuine love for beautiful products, but my interests are extensive and go beyond looks. This was really well written! XO -Kim
    www.thethirtysomethinglife.com

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    1. Thank you :) and I also just have a real passion for beauty! xx

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  42. I absolutely adored this post, Jasmine! It's so relatable!

    https://guiliannamarie.blogspot.com

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  43. I love this post, thank you so much for voicing this!!

    Kez | acaciasdreams.com

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  44. I actually don't talk about blogging that often to people so when they realise they are always surprised as I dedicate my time to volunteering in animal welfare and fostering hard dog rescue cases. I also did a degree in conservation and one in international development so it drives me nuts when people try to tell me that I don't care about others or the planet etc etc because almost 100% of the time I am doing more than them and I'm severely sick. There are a few bad eggs in the beauty world and they often have no care for other bloggers or people or anything like that, but you're right, I've seen them in every single industry. It's just the way people are. I just hope the good ones outweigh the bad ones when it comes to presence online. I don't see why we can't fully support one another :)
    Alinta - polishandpaws.com.au

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    1. Good for you - though you shouldn't even have to justify yourself to these idiots! xx

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  45. Thank you so much for the comments on this post - I'm really glad this resonated with so many of you and I loved reading all your thoughts on this topic, as well as seeing what a diverse bunch of people read my blog who all love beauty as much as me :) xx

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  46. I actually read this post back when you published but didn't get time to comment till now...and I have to say this is one of the best posts I've read ever. Its journalism at its best...it hits home like no other post.
    Only a few members of my family know that I blog and I, for some reason, would like to keep it that way. I don't want to be judged by others and friends that I dedicate my free time to talking about beauty.
    And then on the other hand, I choose to wear a face veil - a niqab - and I feel judged left right and centre by society regardless, but throw into that a passion for expressing myself through makeup that no-one else will ever see and I'm suddenly the target to a multitude of comments questioning why I bother to wear makeup in the first place...like I can only indulge in something that is only warranted by others seeing it. Urgh! Anyway...rant over. Awesome post as always is all I wanted to say...lol! xxx

    Sal | UmmBaby Beauty

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    1. Thank you so much Sal! And that just proves more than anything that most people don't wear makeup and love beauty for the benefit of others! Maybe one day we will live in a less prejudiced and judgemental society where women don't feel obliged to apologise or justify the choices they freely make xx

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  47. I really enjoyed reading this post and it was beautifully written. Fear of being judged is one of the reasons I haven't told my friends or family that I have a blog and I really hate that it matters to me. Writing a post about perfume doesn't negate the fact that I'm an intelligent person, I think it shows that bloggers are well-rounded people!

    Lisabeth
    lisabethwestwood.wordpress.com

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